ACL 2023: The Eats!

I know I talk a lot about the tunes, but you also gotta pay attention to the food you can get in the Fest - key thing to think through before you walk in the door.  Actually, this year, it feels like they increased the number of vendors by a lot!  I wonder if that is real or just my perception.  Here is the full list.

Although what I really want is for them to release a list of what each booth will sell.  Hard to know how pumped I might be about East Side King, when they could fire up some Por Qui Buns, or they might fire out some weird noodle thing.  You never know!

You will eat well at this festival.  They do an awesome job of bringing legit local food folks out there to offer a wildly diverse menu, from pizza and burgers to ethnic and back to BBQ. I know for most of you, it is no longer a big deal to see legit food available at a festival, but I'm old enough to have suffered through Willie's Picnic at the big field beside Luckenbach, where your choices were like cold, stringy turkey legs and cheese whiz nachos.  It ain't cheap, but you can probably do two meals for about $30 total (plus $800 in beer) for a good day at Zilker.  Or you can bring your kids and watch them blow through $300 in food and yet refuse to finish any of it because it "tastes funny."  Whatever!  Wheeee!

The original Eats zone is still over there between the Tito's tent and the Barton Springs beer hall (on the river side of the park), and then the smaller Eats space is still over by that new Barton Springs stage that is across Barton Springs Drive from the rest of the park.    This year they added in an ACL Sweets zone, which can be found on the map near the Kiddie Limits area.

Before I get to favorite and whatnot, I have to note that they screwed us all since the past years.  The absolute best deal in the park used to be the P. Terry's burger.  You could get a very good burger for $4, in a line that hauled ass because they already have the burgers ready to hand out.  So it was quick, good, cheap, and easy.  The best thing to just nab while trying to haul ass between shows.  But its gone again.  That sucks.  Wholly Cow and Shake Shack are on the menu still, but in my opinion that joint is overpriced and overrated.

Also - NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO - Mighty Cone isn't on the list.  This is the worst thing that has ever happened in the history of bad things happening.  Those things were awesome.  They have a chicken and a shrimp, and I recall destroying several every year.  Great crunch on the fried protein, plus a tasty sauce, some slaw, and a bad, hard tortilla.  Yummo.  End of an era.

Awesome Things:

• Taco Bronco.  This one is in its second year in the park, and their tacos are super tasty.  On the small side for sure, but they taste amazing.  I think I had like a Suadero and a Carnitas, or something like that.
• Burro Cheese Kitchen.  I've eaten these things several times and they are freaking good.  Those little King's hawaiian rolls with cheese melted inside are mighty tasty!
• Flyrite Chicken.  Haven't tried them at the Fest before, but their fried chicken sammies are good stuff. 
• Pizza Rolls from Austin's pizza.  Easy, greasy, and good.
• Happy Chicks tenders are fired perfection.  Nothing swanky or weird, just good.
• Hawk's Hot Chicken.  Got the little hot nuggets and they were great.  Hot from the frier and good spice level.

Not Awesome Things:

• Chi'Lantro Kimchi Fries.  $8.  This trailer used to be right across the street from my office and it was awesome.  They pretty much serve that one kind of meat 7 or 8 different ways.  The burger, with a fried egg on it, is so fantastic.  But that wasn't an option here, so I went with the fries.  I recall them being less than warm, and kind of sad and soggy underneath the yummy kimchi.  Mediocre.
• Also had their chicken taco last year, and the meat was pretty cold.  Kinda nasty.
• Mmmpanadas green chile chicken empanada.  $8.  My recollection of this is that this was a poor choice.  I thought it would be a good change of pace, but I recall it being kind of waxy and dry.  And pretty sure I pooped green afterwards.
• Lonesome Dove Austin.  I can't recall what I ordered, but I remember thinking afterwards that there was no line at that booth for a reason.
• I haven't done Original Blacks BBQ at the Fest, but I personally find their Austin locaiton to be underwhelming.  Tastes reheated.
• I'm sad to put them here, but East Side King used to be my jam.  The Poor Qui Buns were amazing, but they aren't on the menu now.  They also do fried chicken thigh chunks that are sometimes awesome, but usually overly crunchy, like they were cooked 8 hours ago and then just kept warm).
• Shawarma Point.  The pita was dried out and cool, and the meat is more like a ground meat thing and not sliced off of the trompo.  We also got felafel bites and they were rock hard.
• Skull and Cakebones - Double Smashburger.  Soggy and unappetizing.  They had a super short line (I wonder why?!?!?) so I went with it but it was pretty gross.

No Torchy's?  WTF, man!?  No more Taco Deli?  WTF, man?!  No more Stubb's, which is jenky, because it was my other go to easy meal in the park. Their chopped beef sandwich comes with chips for $8.  But they aren't listed on the website anymore.  Crap, and Salt Lick is gone too!  They used to have great, huge, messy nachos.  You can also get Micklethwait Barbeque, which has some great food.  I ate at their festival-style booth at a golf tournament once and it was excellent.  The brisket was well cooked and flavorful and all the nerdy nerd things that BBQ snobs demand now out of anything they eat.  I recall a pickle or something too.  Anyway, you should try that.

Assuming I can tear myself away from East Side Kings and Mighty Cone, here are some things that I want to seek out to try:

• I love Koko's Bavarian - at their brick and mortar their soft pretzel is my favorite of all time.  So buttery and salty and puffy and awesome.  (I heard from another Fest goer that it was awesome)
• Salt & Time is good in its brick and mortar location?
• Homie Fries?  May be good, if it is like a pile of good meat dumped onto french fries?
• I've heard good things about Cuantos Tacos but haven't been yet.  I really want to try their hamburger...
• Mama Fried is interesting solely because of the name.  I dig it.
• Steamies Dumplings is interesting!
• If Nervous Charlies is doing a bagel sandwich, those things are freaking money.  (another where I saw someone scarfing one and asked and they said it was good).

As for actual eating, know that it is a grind to get the best stuff during the usual eating times. Now that Torchy's is gone, the major lines are at the pizza places - the kids want their pizza! But also the taco places get long lines - the word is out and the tourists want to eat the tacos.  This is one of the reasons I used to just go with the burger - for ease - they have them ready and you just snag, pay, and roll along.  And on hot days, the sno-cones and popsicles and whatnot are going to have insane lines.  So, half of the time, my eating decision ends up being based not on what I want the most, but on what has the shortest lines!

Also, regardless of how tired you are of standing, you likely are not going to get a spot to sit in the shade by the food stands unless it is an off time.  Usually, every seat in the big eating tent is occupied by some large group of bored-looking college kids who are texting each other and fanning themselves with their hip, straw fedoras.  They aren't eating, but when you glance around with food in hand, hopefully scanning for a spot to sit, they do not move, or offer their seat, they just continue to chew their gum and stare.  I love the youth.  

The new food area by the Barton Springs stage did not have any seating or tents in which to eat, it was just a place to buy the food and shove it into your gullet.

There are a handful of other weird things you can get, like Amy's ice cream or snocones or cake pops or bananas covered in stuff or juice or popsicles, but I'm not about that stuff.  I want fuel to get me to the next show and soak up my beers.  I AIN'T GOT TIME FOR THE BULLHONKEY BANANA COATED IN PEANUT DUST!  GIMME MEATS AND CHEESES WRAPPED IN CARBS!